baetiful | IC CONTACT POST

[what's the opposite of incentive...]

Yes, that does leave it rather vague, when speaking of Targaryens.

[Viserys. Jaime is not impressed.]

I remember the child, at least. The way I heard it, he met a most unfortunate end across the Narrow Sea some time ago. Why the gods seen fit to resurrect him... I suppose we can only speculate. Or say a prayer and hope the mistake is corrected. As that's not likely to happen--what do you intend to do about a truly mad Targaryen?

Avoid his path and allow him to be his sister's problem.

[ Which is at least a little bit true. Viserys is a bit like a mad dog, or a mad dragon in this case. He can be set loose to create loads of chaos, but there's not really any controlling him. ]

I do not believe him to be a true threat, at the least. He hasn't the wits of his sister nor the strength of his brother. And if he has some ungodly ability given to him by the porter at his disposal, well, I imagine the world would have been leveled by now. As it has not been, it's safe to say he should not be too much of a problem.

Finally, some good news. And an easy task.

[Because it's not like Jaime has some great desire to meet with some shadow version of Rhaegar, which is all that he can take as an impression from what Littlefinger has said.]

Does he live in the same city as she does, or will I need to keep a watch for him? I presume he'll be easy to spot.

When I encountered him, it was within the Falls. I'm uncertain if this is where he has made a home or not. But I've heard whispers he is rather close to Theon Greyjoy.

[ But given that they're rumors, the rumors made it sound like they were in a relationship. And maybe they were. Who knew either of their inclinations. And that's one thing Baelish didn't really care to know. ]

You will not be able to miss him should you encounter him. The color of their hair is unmistakable. And you'll likely hear his tantrums well before you see him.

[ew]

I must say, that is not an alliance [or whatever it is] I would have expected. Perhaps they find solace in their mutual inadequacies.

[But honestly, Jaime would rather not think about this very much.]

I'll keep both eyes and ears out. I assume Theon Greyjoy is allied with the Starks? Squids and dragons and wolves in a single bed does not promise much in the way of peace.

[ Petyr pauses. ]

Where are you from in terms of the timeline of our world? I assume you have not heard of the goings on of the Red Wedding. And the Starks would not be likely to inform you of such a thing.

[ But leave it to good pal Petyr to fill in the blanks. ]

I only ask, of course, because the last all of us heard of Theon Greyjoy, he betrayed the Stark family and went on to claim Winterfell for the Ironborn. This all indirectly led to the Lannister victory over the Starks. Rumor had it that he burned both Bran and Rickon Stark alive. Of course, that did not turn out to be true. At least as far as Rickon is concerned. It was Jon Snow alone who holds the responsibility for Rickon's death.

Actually, it was Lady Stark who informed me of that wedding feast. A terrible thing, so of course she tried to lay blame for it on House Lannister.

[Another gap of knowledge which Jaime must trust to someone else to bridge for him. At least Littlefinger is ostensibly an ally. It is not beneath him to lie for his own benefit, of course--but Jaime cannot see the angle that might move Baelish to lie about what he says of Greyjoy and the Stark children.]

And I hope I won't be expected to thank Greyjoy for that victory. The last I knew of him, he was smirking at me on the wrong side of a bloody cage after the Battle of the Whispering Wood. I suppose I must have seen him in passing after that, but every one of Stark's men looked much the same to me.

[It's nearly funny, how little he has thought of the Stark children left at Winterfell. A crippled child was as good as dead anyways, he had once said as much to Cersei. The things I do for love, murder and betrayal and oathbreaking. Turning a cloak could be done for love. Perhaps that's what moved Greyjoy toward betrayal.]

I assume Jon Snow's guilt in that death is indirect as well. If you tell me he betrayed the Starks too, I won't know what to think of the world any longer.

Oh no. There's nothing to thank Greyjoy for other than continuing to further be a disastrous representation of his kind and making mistakes that benefit us. I'm certain he will only continue that fine tradition here.

[ Because that's the only thing Theon Greyjoy can be dependable in. Being a failure. ]

As for Snow's involvement, it was both indirect and a direct consequence of his foolishness. He was at battle with Ramsay Bolton, knowing of Bolton's reputation -- knowing that playing Bolton's game would only result in the death of his brother. And yet, because of his need to be a hero and do the right thing, he charged forward and left his forces behind at battle. He got his brother killed and nearly ended his own life. He is his father's son, after all.

House Greyjoy has had a great deal of shame as of late. They should really change their words.

[Sidebar, Jaime really wishes Tyrion was still here to come up with some hilarious new words for the Greyjoys.]

Ramsay Bolton? Last I heard, that one was still a Snow. Lord Bolton is strangely desperate for heirs if he's legitimizing bastards. I suppose war is difficult for men of all ranks.

But especially the Starks. A sad end to that great House, but I suppose I'd expect nothing less from the honorable Jon Snow. And all this over a child who must have barely remembered his name.

A lot has happened between the point in time you're from and where I come from. But I would not count the Stark family defeated. Jon Snow was able to beat Ramsay in battle and has now been named the new King of the North.

[ Is that disgust in Baelish's tone? Absolutely. ]

And I believe he may try to carry that nobility over here, especially since he is already courting a queen.

Oh, good. Another king. We were running rather low.

[What with all the wars and the murders.]

It was my understanding that every man who wished to rule in this country needed to be elected. Even his queen seems to have figured that out. And you, too, of course. In a contest of popularity, I would find his selection hard to believe. For one, he makes terrible conversation.

Oh, I do not mean he would be a king here in the official sense, of course. But it will not stop others from rallying around him, from admiring him and his lady fair -- from starting to hold him on the same sort of pedestal. The civilians can sometimes go a bit mad over imPort couplings. They will even see it where it does not exist.

And this is where he would be able to find himself elected to a sort of position of power -- even if he's hardly qualified for such. A bridge we shall cross where the time comes -- because the one true thing that unites you and I is the fact that Ned Stark's children, bastard and all, despise us both.

Edited 2017-06-12 03:02 (UTC)

A dark day for us all, but even a bastard's rule is a storm we might weather. Still--as it is upon the foundation of this grudge that we have, in part, built our own happy alliance--I'll be sure to send letters of thanks to the Starks and to Daenerys Targaryen both, the moment I lay my hands upon some parchment and ink.

Which, speaking of--do you intend to continue to employ Mormont after all of this?

[ There's hesitation. Not because he would shy away from telling Jaime if he was going to keep Jorah or not, but because Baelish still has yet to decide what the best course would be. ]

Mormont is good at what he does. He's kept me alive and he's been a large part of why I've been able to keep a relatively peaceful relationship with the dragon queen.

[ A pause. ]

However, I am not foolish enough to believe I harbor his loyalty so long as she is in this world. This most recent event has been proof of that.

[ There's another pause. It seems as though Baelish is working through it as he speaks. ]

I've contemplated both options and I'm leaning toward keeping him employed for the time being. We must still continue to play the game, after all, and so long as I provide him with a paycheck, he should not turn his blade on me.

Or on you again. Hopefully.

If you believe coin will still his hand, you either know something I don't, or you do not value dragon cunt very highly. At least, not so highly as Mormont values it.

[Love and devotion and loyalty and allegiance, all mixed up in one blinding force. Jaime counts himself lucky that his love is neatly bound up with the interests of House Lannister, in every way. Even then, he would as of like choose Cersei over even his lord father.]

Still. Your business is your own. Though for my part, I must tell you, Lord Baelish, that I do not like the sound of that hopefully. If there are any blades turned on me, I can't promise to smile at them as readily as you seem able. Call it a strength of mine--one that will, I suppose, be an asset to you in turn, should the promise of pay turn out to be less tempting than you believe.

[ Jorah is not a fool in Baelish's opinion. Unless Daenerys went mad someday, she would likely not order him to turn on the man who paid him well and also served as an ambassador. He could be wrong, of course. But he kind of hopes not. ]

Should he turn his blade on you again, I give you full leeway to see him dead. Of course, bear in mind that death means little in a world where we can revive at the will of the little machines in our bodies. But I am certain Ser Jorah knows that his continued employment relies solely on being able to keep the peace within our little group. I'll not give him a third chance.

I've hardly forgotten. And if it proves true for Ser Jorah, it would be my great honor to kill him again.

[Bold words for a guy with one hand, especially after Mormont beat him (no pun intended) so handily. It will not happen a second time. Jaime has already vowed it. And whatever godsgift or magics allowed Ser Jorah to walk the beach without so much as a limp after Jaime had stabbed him in the leg not hours prior, well, Jaime will find a way to beat that, too.]

As it will be my great pleasure to face him in Maruita Falls. Peacefully, of course. I, at least, intend to keep my continued employment, so long as it's convenient to me. There's little to tempt me away.

And so continues our mutually beneficial relationship.

[ A pause. ]

Have you any interest in an ambassadorial position?

[Jaime actually laughs.]

I'm afraid you have the wrong Lannister, Lord Baelish. I have no interest in the politics of any country.

Is it politics? Or is it power? In this world, the true governing force is political. And the only way to have some semblance of control over that is to take the path that leans you into that government.

Over the next several months, you may change your mind. And if you do, simply let me know. There are many benefits to being my friend.

That doesn't surprise me. Your friends have always managed to find success, Lord Baelish, until the day that they are, sadly, no longer your friends. Then their fortunes seem to change.

And yet I've always preferred the sort of power that allows me to split the head of my opponent, and the sort of force that comes of commanding an army. Until ambassadors begin to take that sort of leadership in this country, I'm afraid I'll remain uninterested.

But don't worry. I'll find other ways to benefit from your friendship.

Correlation is not precisely causation. I cannot be entirely to blame for a former friend's poor fortune, can I? Though if fortune favors those who do remain my friend, then perhaps that should be a thing to bear in mind in the future.

[ Lannisters always pay their debts and Baelishes always seem to be tied to the fortune of others. So they are pretty well locked into this relationship with a mutual understanding. What pals they are! ]

But I shall await your requests otherwise, Ser Jaime. As your friend. Is there anything else you may need at the moment?

Don't worry. I intend to remain your friend.

[For now, with no illusions that the same brevity could turn back on him as well. So long as he's useful and so long as wolves and dragons are in bed together, their fortunes must align similarly out of preservation.

For now.]

I need a bath, but I'll ask that you not be involved in that. [No matter how awkward it is to bathe with one hand.] Thank you for hearing out my grievances, Lord Baelish. I'll see you in your city very soon.

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